What do you call a gathering of vegans? … A buzzkill. This witty observation sprouts from the genius of Doug Abel, co-founder of the Woodstock Farm Animal Sanctuary. “Recently I was joking around with Dan Piraro about the words used for plurals of animals–a gaggle of geese, a cackle of hyenas, a murder of crows–and I came up with a ‘buzzkill’ of vegans,” he explains.
This punchline will be proved all kinds of wrong this Thursday at Comedy for Karma, the all-star stand-up comedy event to benefit the Woodstock Farm Animal Sanctuary. The tall “boyish man” Gary Gulman and sidesplittingly self-deprecating Louis C.K. return for their third time, while gritty insomniac Dave Attell makes it for a second round. New this year are two Daily Show celebs, co-creator Lizz Winstead and fake news correspondent Wyatt Cenac. Em-cee will be illustrious funny-man Dan Piraro.
Doug elaborates on his buzzkill coinage:
“I recall a joke from my college days in the late ’80s…
Q: How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: That’s not funny!!!!
“If written today,” Doug says, this joke “would certainly be about vegans. We have a reputation for being militant misanthropic schmucks (because we refuse to eat corpses). Actually, the version I heard just a few years ago was, ‘That’s worse than a vegan birthday party’–probably a reference as much to the dry, carob-based cakes of a decade ago as the dry, carob-based personalities that vegans are supposed to have.”
“But the reality is that lots of vegheads have well-formed funnybones despite their Buzzkill Baselines,” he adds. “And in fact the phrase “happy vegan” kicks angry vegan’s butt by a factor of 15 on Google!”
You too can join the giant buzzkill of vegans to benefit the animals at the Woodstock sanctuary at NYC’s Gotham Comedy Club this Thursday, April 1 (no joke). Tickets always sell out, so it’s smart to buy in advance. $50 for general admission and $100 for reserved VIP seats.
Check out this hilarious video of Triumph the Insult Comic Dog interviewing Doug Abel about the event, scooping poop at the sanctuary, and humorless vegans.