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Lady Scouts Cookies

Paskesz Mint Creme Cookies

Editor’s Note: Yeah, we’re not too sure these cookies have any real resemblance to Thin Mints, what with the creme and vanilla cookie, but we still hope to inhale a box in the near future.

One of my happiest childhood memories involves cookies. I was a Girl Scout, and in 198whenever, my mom, who is not usually insane, volunteered our house to be the local distribution center for the annual cookie drive. It was like Cookie Christmas: I woke up one morning, came downstairs and found our entire living room filled, floor to ceiling, with cases of cookies. A whole room of cookies! At first, I was in heaven. Then I got to the part where (much like it is to be vegan now) I wasn’t allowed to eat them and it became torture.

I held out secret hope that if any cookies went unsold, California’s possession laws would grant me ownership. I turned in my sash and quit the club when those overachievers sold the last damn box. But today I have found redemption! All I need is a stockpile of cash, the room of my choice, and Paskesz Mint Creme Cookies by the caseload. Thin Mints! And the packaging doesn’t lie, they are approximately 3,782 times better frozen. Girl Scout’s honor.

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