I don’t live in New York anymore, so maybe Tierra Sana really is the Greatest Restaurant In The History Of Creation, but then again, it’s in Queens, so doesn’t that automatically rule it out?
I’d like to nominate Myth Diner for this prestigious, albeit completely fictional GRITHOC honor.
Myth Diner is conveniently located to everyone, just off that street that never has traffic, it’s got ample parking and is always always open. The menu’s got something for everyone (even non-vegans can’t wait to stuff face) and it rocks breakfast, brunch, lunch and dinner all night long and serves it every day.
Timed perfectly with your arrival are a steaming bottomless cup of fair trade coffee, the almond/rice/or soy milk of your mind, vanilla agave syrup, and a glass of water, no ice thanks. All the seating is comfy corner booths, except for the large communal table, where awkward-free conversation flows like the organic fair trade coffee, and everyone you meet is your new bestie for life, and every seat comes with an electrical outlet and fast as data can travel wi-fi.
You might be overwhelmed by the menu, but the super cute-in-the-face waiter knows exactly what you want.
Did I mention desert is served first at Myth Diner? And they’ve got every single Vegan Treats treat ever made, all of which are Tuesday quality, no matter what day you visit! Your adorable waiter recommends you eat half, then move on to your entree, repeat.
When choosing your entree, you’re not afraid to try something new because everything is the best thing you’ve ever set tongue on! And Myth diner has some incredibly convincing faux meats you’ve probably never tasted before.
Menu highlights include, but are not limited to:
- Mermaid* Sea Stew
- Unicorn** Chimichanga with extra Guac
- Stuffed Griffin** roast with Savory Sweet Potato Hash and Creamed Spinach
- Puff Dragon** Patty with a side of Jerk Jabba**
- Godzilla* Pizza (equivalent to a “Meat Lovers”)
- Bigfoot* Burger with the Falkor** Fries
- Troll n’ Cheeze
*meat is soy based
**meat is wheat based
Hey, what’s that song they’re playing? Oh! That’s my favorite song! But! The best part of Myth Diner is that everything is calorie free, unclogs your arteries like Drano of the heart, and comes with a Gas Free Guarantee!