Never in my somewhat-wild dreams did I imagine searching “vegan” on the beloved and sometimes scandalous Craigslist would yield so many capital letters.

VEGETARIAN AND VEGAN FEMALES NEEDED. A UNIQUE GIG. HIGH PAY.

YOU CAN BE ANY AGE AND ANY RACE. A UNIQUE GIG. PRIVATE AND DISCRETE. EVENING/WEEKEND ARE AVAILABLE. REGULAR BASE AVAILABLE. PLEASE REPLY WITH YOUR AGE, HEIGHT/WEIGHT. PICTURE A PLUS. HIGH PAY. $200-$400 EACH TIME.

Unique, perhaps; mysterious, most definitely. Is the sex – er, I mean, casual encounters industry seeking a more sophisticated (and sexy) crop of escorts by going veg? Is someone seeking models for rapidly-photographed sessions of hide the Field Roast smoked apple sage vegan sausage? (I’d eat it, if I were you – those things are tasty.)

What are your theories? Anyone gutsy enough to respond? Anyone unspeakably offended? Discuss!

8 Comments

1. 
   Comment by

   dustinbuster

   on November 21, 2006 at 3:26 pm #

   They (I don’t know who “they” actually are) want you to shit in a bowl. I ain’t shitting you, either. If you don’t believe me, check out: http://www.theppk.com (the forums) and search the topics. Or better yet, respond to the ad, and find out for yourself. I hope someone invents a term—like real fast—for someone who is obsessed and/or turned on by vegan shit.

2. 
   Comment by

   IsaChandra

   on November 22, 2006 at 1:47 am #

   Yeah, we investigated this in depth.

   http://www.postpunkkitchen.com/forum/viewtopic.php?id=13182&p=1

   Read the full 7 pages, it’ll be the best hour you’ve ever spent on the internet.

3. 
   Comment by

   Patrick Kwan

   on November 22, 2006 at 4:18 am #

   If I were a girl, I’d do it. ;)

4. 
   Comment by

   ariela

   on November 22, 2006 at 1:40 pm #

   i emailed them but they didnt write me back :( id totally poop or pee for someone for that much $ haha

5. 
   Comment by

   Laura Leslie

   on November 22, 2006 at 5:40 pm #

   This is seriously going to give me nightmares.

6. 
   Comment by

   Olivia Lane

   on November 22, 2006 at 6:18 pm #

   If things don’t work out at my current job, it’s nice to know what my options are. Heh heh.

7. 
   Comment by

   eileen_loves_vegans

   on November 23, 2006 at 12:53 am #

   hilarious! i compulsively search “vegan” in craigslist job openings like every day and never saw this! oh- i guess because its under casual encounters- i just clicked on the link. anyway, my impression is that anything under “casual encounters” on craigslist involves creepy old men. but i’ll read the stuff on PPK cause this sounds so funny and entertaining!

8. 
   Comment by

   eileen_loves_vegans

   on November 23, 2006 at 1:04 am #

   wow so i just read the entire thread on ppk, and i haven’t laughed this hard in a long long time! how CREEEPY!